Dreaming Takes Two
The man I married happens to also be the biggest dreamer I’ve ever met.
He is the reason that all those crazy things that we ever talked about have actually happened. Like paying off over $50,000 in student loans in 13 months. Like moving across the world to care of the medical needs of orphan children. Like trekking volcanos & diving at shipwreck sites (although he still can’t get me to skydive). He’s so much of the reason that this blog is what it is and that after years of saying I wanted to, I am actually in the process of writing a book.
He takes an idea and explodes it in the best possible way.
His imagination is wild and his mind only see options that are limitless.
This is one part of him that I love so much and it is the same part that gives me chest pain and heart palpitations. Seriously.
He’s The Fun One & She Gets Stuff Done
Before I was married, I would hear wives jokingly (but not really) say things like ‘if it weren’t for my husband we’d never have any fun but if it weren’t for me, we’d never get anything done.’
I hated this.
I didn’t want to be a drill sergeant wife who was only good at getting stuff done and not so much a fun wife. But I’m a little more type A and he’s a little more type B so when we got married, that’s the way it felt a lot of times, he made sure we had fun while I made sure we got stuff done.
We’ve come to know first hand some of the disappointments that marriage inevitably brings and we’ve found that dreaming is one of those areas.
You have the picture in your head of finding the person whom your heart beats in sync with and your dreams collide in beautiful and magical ways and then life happens with its schedules, deadlines, student loans to pay off, bills that line up, and some lack of sleep mixed in. It’s not the most conducive environment for dreams to be realized and acted upon all the time.
Number One Fan
As a wife you want to be the number one biggest fan of your husband.
You want to see him succeed, not fail.
You want him to be happy in every way imaginable and all of his dreams to come true.
You would do so much and give up so much to make his dreams a reality.
That’s the way I have always felt about Justin and his dreams, I would do anything to make them happen.
But often times that’s not what I end up communicating to him.
When my husband presents an outlandish idea I tend to respond with ‘that sounds awesome!’ or ‘wow that’s crazy!’ but then I quickly jump to logistics.
How will that work?
Do we have the resources?
Financially does that make sense?
Do we have the time to invest?
Those questions are the biggest buzz kills to dreamers
Being realistic, thinking things through, and plotting and planning are all wise and valuable. But they will kill dreams prematurely.
I wish I head learned a lot sooner that value in dreaming along with him, even if its just for 5 minutes and the conversation is absolutely outrageous.
Dreaming with One Another
These days when my husband says the most outrageous thing I have ever heard, something that could not possibly come to be, I just roll with it.
It’s not in a disingenuous way but I’ve some to see that dreams can never be fully dreamed, ideas can never be realized to their fullest potential if you cut them off at the knees in their baby stage.
So when I start having palpitations because I’m convinced my husband is insane, I shut my mouth.
Anything slightly reasonable, rational, or realistic, I don’t say.
Logic, reason, finances and reality will come. Our husbands are not idiots.
I just jump on board and dream right along beside him.
When I do that with him, he feels like I’m his number one biggest fan.
He sees me as his biggest cheerleader and strongest advocate.
So let’s dream with our men!
They might be a little crazy, they may seem too ambitious at times, but I think most of those crazy things that they dream of are possible. And they just might come to be if we dream alongside them.
It takes two to dream.
So for right now, forget about the logistics, throw finances out the window, who cares that you don’t have the right degree or you don’t live in the right place.
Just dream together.
And dream the biggest craziest, most unfeasible things your minds can possibly imagine.