Last week I was chatting with a fellow blogger and we stumbled into the conversation of how much is too much to share on your blog and on social media channels.
With the presence of social media and blogs, especially ones that are geared more towards ‘real life’ and place value on having an authentic tone, that fine line of sharing can be tricky to discern.
This questions ‘how much is too much to share’ can translates into real life relationships too, not just our digital profiles. What to share and what not to share when it comes to personal matters, marriage, parenting & career is something that each person much answer for themselves.
In my writing, especially when it comes to my marriage, this is a questions I have had to answer for myself to determine what I will share and what I won’t. Here are 3 guidelines I use to filter what I share through.
1. Don’t share anything you have not openly communicated about
If it about your marriage, you need to first and foremost communicate about it with one another, especially if it is the slightest bit vulnerable or honest.
Sharing on social media or other digital platforms about the closest & most intimate relationship you have is a big deal, make sure that your spouse is comfortable with what you are sharing.
If they’re not comfortable, out of respect for them I think it's wise to not post it. After all they are a heck of a lot more important than a few old high school friends who will like the post or a few comments
2. Keep somethings to yourself
Call it old fashioned, call it southern proper but keep some things a mystery.
That phrase ‘keep some things a mystery’ was one I head a dozen times before getting married by women in their 40s, 50s and 60s as they gave me all sorts of sought out and also completely unsolicited marriage advice.
But there is wisdom there. Keep some things a mystery, about yourself, about your marriage and about your life.
No one needs to know it all and they probably don't want to know it all either. Keep somethings to yourself.
3. Consider your motive for sharing.
Ask yourself the question ‘why am I sharing this in the first place?’ or if you want to really dig into it, ask yourself ‘what am I feeling?’ because tapping into that emotion, whether it be sadness, anger, fear, shame etc. can give incredible insight into why you are sharing what you are sharing.
Social media and digital platforms should not be a place where you go seeking connection, validation or affirmation.
Seeking those in the digital world can be dangerous to your relationships and to your soul.
If you are sharing from a sincere place of wanting others to know that they are not alone that is wonderful.
if you are wanting to share from a genuine place of desiring to help others, please do. But before clicking ‘publish’ or ‘post’ consider your motive, why are you sharing what you’re sharing?